❤Blind date script pdf






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I stopped dating about three months ago. WOMAN Well, you should. He's planning on defending himself.
An it could get me a few sympathy votes as well, But I wont let on until after the show, just in case. Please notify me if you encounter a stale link. These things don't smell. There you are, you filthy beast.
You come out to find that thieves have off your stereo. Well, Felix Robertson is a lovely boy. If you want a song played, call the radio station right now. Now the other hand. The waiter enters, tapping his cane and glad a bright red baby carriage. I it's some kind of test. So, what the hell, I talk to her. Sleigh obtusely bungles his way past assassins and corrupt officials as though he were Clouseau's American cousin. 
Blind Date (1987) Movie Script - My face is numb. He's been chasing me for three months.
The table is covered by a huge white cloth, the front of which hangs down to the floor. Two napkins, two glasses of water, a vase with two real roses in it, and a bottle of ketchup sit on the table. The lighting is subdued but gradually becomes brighter as the play progresses. BLIND DATE A man and a woman sit facing each other at a small restaurant table. He forces a polite smile. She responds in kind. He forces another smile. The man dabs his forehead with his napkin. The man casually looks around for a waiter, then shrugs. The woman unzips her pocketbook and nonchalantly pokes through it. She removes a small, battery-operated hand fan from the pocketbook. She switches it on and begins moving the fan around her face. The man watches her. The woman brings the fan down to her neck. She pushes her hair back. The man sips some water from his glass. She unbuttons the first button of her blouse and fans her upper chest. The man again searches for a waiter. The woman turns the fan off and puts it back in her pocketbook. The man, almost unconsciously, begins drumming on the table. His rhythmic drumming gets louder and more urgent. The woman looks around with mild concern. The drumming becomes fierce and unrestrained. She takes the roses out of the vase and carefully places them on the table. She grabs the vase and throws the water at the man. He wipes his forehead with his napkin. WOMAN Be nice if they could spare a waiter. WOMAN Well, you should. The man absentmindedly starts drumming on the table. The woman shoots him a look. He stops MAN Sorry. WOMAN Do you play drums? The woman tugs at the front of her shirt and rustles it back and forth to cool off. WOMAN What are you looking at? The WAITER then appears. He is blind and legally deaf. He enters wearing dark glasses and carrying a white cane. With surprising rapidity, he brushes past the table and tosses two menus onto it MAN Excuse me, could we — The waiter has disappeared WOMAN How do they stay in business? The man hands her a menu and studies one himself WOMAN Was he blind? The woman sets her menu down and eyes the man sharply WOMAN Is that supposed to tell me something? MAN grim So… where are you from originally? MAN The gaping pit of hell. MAN I was close. The man smiles at his wit. The man uses his water glass to refill the vase. He replaces the flowers, carefully arranging and rearranging them WOMAN Is this supposed to demonstrate your sensitivity? WOMAN long pause I hear oysters are very mealy this time of year. MAN Is that so? MAN shrugs I had some juicy clams last night. MAN Maybe we should both just leave. The woman gathers her purse. We hear the sound of a tapping cane as the waiter approaches. The woman stops her motions. The waiter stands MAN pause Can we help you? The man rises Look, we were just in the middle of leaving anyway, so you might as well.. WAITER loudly GOOD EVENING! ARE YOU READY TO ORDER? WAITER THANK YOU, SIR. WOULD YOU LIKE TO ORDER NOW? WAITER nods, pause WHAT? WOMAN unsure To stay.. The waiter takes the order by scrawling it in the air with his finger WAITER YOU WANT VEGETABLES WITH THAT? WOMAN What do you have? The waiter bends sideways and cocks the woman his better ear WOMAN What kind? The waiter begins pounding on the floor with his cane. He stops WAITER KEEPS AWAY THE RATS. WAITER YOU WANT THE VEAL? MAN IS THE VEAL FRESH? MAN Oh, for — WHAT WOULD YOU RECOMMEND? MAN long pause WHAT IS THE SPECIAL? WAITER I ASKED YOU WHAT DAY IT IS. WHAT ARE YOU, DEAF? WAITER THURSDAY SPECIAL IS…OYSTERS. WAITER collecting the menus YOU WERE WARNED. The waiter exits, shouting towards the kitchen WAITER ONE SWORDFISH, AND A VEAL FOR THE ASSHOLE! WOMAN pause Boy, you sure showed him. MAN What is your problem? WOMAN You depress me. The woman unzips her purse and removes a toothbrush. Maso-sad… It has something to do with castration. MAN crossing his legs So what do you do exactly? I work with slow children. The woman puts her toothbrush back in her purse MAN Sounds very rewarding. WOMAN You know how hard it is to communicate with those stupid little bastards? MAN Does music help? WOMAN I play a lot of Vaughan Williams. WOMAN Every day for a month. They share a chuckle And yes, I did register the fact that you know who Vaughan Williams is, and I am duly impressed. MAN Silverman, Silverman and McCabe. WOMAN End up defending a lot of crooks? Lawyers and people who eat veal. WOMAN No, you do. It starts right above the chin and works its way around both sides of the jaw. The man retreats and sits. He stares into space, then up at the ceiling. The woman, unsettled, picks up the vase. But before she can throw more water at the man, He grabs her and kisses her passionately. The waiter, oblivious, enters the scene, tapping his cane and carrying two trays of food. The man and woman separate as the waiter feels his way around the table WAITER WE WERE OUT OF SWORDFISH, SO I GAVE YOU A REPLACEMENT. The waiter sets the food down WAITER I WAS KIDDING ABOUT THE VEAL. MAN smiles I figured. The man sniffs his veal. The woman takes a big sip from her water glass and swishes it around her mouth MAN pointing to her mouth full of water Good for digestion? The woman points to her mouth. The man hands her the empty vase, but she waves it off MAN Swallow it. The woman shakes her head. She opens her purse and considers using it MAN Swallow it. Losing air, she finally gulps it down, choking slightly in the process. They begin eating WOMAN You used your tongue. The man stops eating. The man eyes the veal with dismay MAN Maybe we should just skip the meal and go right to the dessert. WOMAN What do I taste like? MAN Better than this veal. I thought maybe you could. MAN thinks Tastes like a nectarine. A nectarine with bones in it. WOMAN And my tongue? MAN At the center of the nectarine… WOMAN Uh huh… MAN Fleshy and magical… WOMAN Yes… MAN A big worm. MAN A juicy, bumpy bloodworm! WOMAN almost in tears Cut it out! He gently reaches for her face and strokes her cheek. He moves to kiss her, but the intimacy troubles him, so he returns to his food MAN How is it? MAN Could be worse. WOMAN Want some peas? MAN How are they? Simultaneously, they reach for the ketchup. She expects him to defer and let go. They have an intense tug-of-war with the ketchup bottle WOMAN Let go! The woman twists the bottle and yanks it out of his hand. She sets the bottle down proudly MAN pause I let you win. The woman casually opens the bottle top and dips her finger in. She begins writing on the tablecloth MAN What are you —? She continues writing MAN Please, this is very — M…E. The woman smiles and licks her finger MAN Timing. The man gallantly rises. He lifts up the tablecloth and motions under the table WOMAN rises, facing him This better be good. The woman ducks and goes under the table. The man follows and lets the tablecloth down. We see nothing except the occasional rustling of the tablecloth. We hear the sounds of mussed clothing and unzipped zippers MAN Okay, now… WOMAN Oh yes, honey, do it. WOMAN Give it to me now. Long pause MAN Yes? WOMAN Now you want to talk about it, right? WOMAN You want me to tell you how great you were. You were great, too. The waiter enters, tapping his cane and pushing a bright red baby carriage. He begins clearing the table, placing the plates in the carriage WAITER FOR DESSERT, WE HAVE RASPBERRY MOUSSE WITH ORANGE SORBET, TRUFFLES IN FLAMING BRANDY, BAVARIAN MOCHA CHEESECAKE WITH RICH PECAN GLAZE, OR FRUIT CUP. The waiter finishes cleaning up and exits with the carriage. Loud sounds of chewing. MAN I find it quite peaceful. WOMAN Of course you do, you came. The woman lifts the tablecloth and crawls out. She sits WOMAN Are you coming out? MAN I was looking forward to the mousse.. WOMAN Cut it out! The woman kicks him MAN Ouch! The man sits WOMAN Maybe we should pick the bones up. The waiter might trip. MAN Why are you so concerned with the waiter? WOMAN He has your eyes. MAN Leave the bones there. Serves him right if he trips. MAN pause Are we in love? WOMAN thinks I find you attractive. WOMAN You turn me on. MAN Other than that. The woman shrugs MAN Do you like the way I dress? MAN The way I eat? MAN Honesty is good for a relationship, right? WOMAN So they say. MAN Well, what about the way you eat? WOMAN What about it? My taste in art? MAN Slightly above average. WOMAN Almost worthwhile… MAN Hmm? WOMAN Almost worth putting up with me the rest of the time because I can get you hard. WOMAN Why are you here, then? WOMAN So, why are you here? MAN I like you. WOMAN Bathing in the afterglow? You want me to make some eternal vow? You want me to pretend I only want you for your mind? Now either we can go; or we can sit here and try to understand what we have together. MAN Well, if you want…we could go back under the table. WOMAN You really are a pig. MAN I was kidding. WOMAN rebuttoning Thank you. She moves to exit WOMAN So long. MAN Do you like raspberry mousse? MAN I love raspberry mousse. But a little of it goes a long way. If you eat too much, you get sick. And if you eat it too often, you get tired of it. You order a whole dinner and hope the mousse tops it off. MAN But what if the meal stinks? What if the mousse is all there is? The waiter reappears carrying a bunch of grapes WOMAN In other words.. The waiter approaches the man WAITER YOUR FRUIT CUP. WE WERE OUT OF CUPS. The waiter sets the grapes down and starts counting the money using touch, sound and smell MAN How can you tell the difference between a single and a fiver? MAN I SAID, HOW CAN YOU DISTINGUISH BETWEEN MONEY? The waiter tears a one-dollar bill to shreds and lets it fall to the floor MAN DID YOU EVER MAKE A MISTAKE AND TEAR UP A HUNDRED DOLLAR BILL? The waiter eats a grape WAITER DID YOU SLEEP WITH HER? MAN shocked I… WAITER OH, COME ON! WAITER NOT JUST DURING BUT AFTER, TOO. The waiter pulls away just in time, and the man lands in a heap on the floor. The waiter gives him a whack with the cane WAITER THE TRUTH! The waiter tosses the man a grape. The man catches it and eats it WAITER WHAT COLOR WERE HER EYES? WAITER ARE YOU SURE? The waiter tosses the man another grape. He catches it in his mouth and swallows it WAITER On a scale of one to ten, she was a…? The waiter temptingly holds up a grape WAITER Think. MAN pause Seven and a half. The waiter viciously whacks him with the cane WAITER BASTARD! She was at least an eight. WAITER EVEN AT THE END? MAN Especially at the end. The waiter throws the man a grape and steps forward WAITER ARE YOU ALONE? WAITER ARE YOU AFRAID OF BEING ALONE? The waiter now towers above the kneeling man WAITER Do you know what love is? MAN Love is beautiful. WAITER shakes his head DO YOU KNOW WHAT LOVE IS? MAN Love is freedom. The man lunges for the grapes with his mouth. The woman has gingerly walked back into the restaurant. WAITER WHAT DO YOU FEEL? MAN Pain WAITER WHY? WAITER WHAT DOES SHE WANT FROM YOU? WAITER WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM HIM? She walks over and takes the grapes from the waiter WOMAN What does he want from me? And yet here we are. WAITER Yes, but not uncommon. I ASK YOU AGAIN: WHAT IS THE MEANING OF LOVE? WAITER DO YOU KNOW THE MEANING OF LOVE? WAITER DO YOU KNOW THE MEANING OF LOVE? WOMAN Of course not. WAITER DOES ANYONE KNOW THE MEANING OF LOVE? The waiter drops the cane. He solemnly nods and begins to comfort the man as a friend. The woman watches WOMAN sadly No one. But sometimes we learn in pieces. The woman puts down the grapes and squashes them beneath her foot. The Waiter and Man watch her leave WAITER NEXT TIME… LET HER PICK THE RESTAURANT.