A World of Wolves
(C)2002 Jared Falvo

Author's note:  Feel free to distribute this 1st chapter as far and wide as you like.  Contact me at the following Email address, to let me know what you thought of this chapter:

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Have you ever been in a car and thought to look out your window at a car you're passing, and suddenly notice the driver or passenger is looking at you?  Or found it uncomfortable to make eye contact with someone you're approaching on the sidewalk as you pass by?  Or felt that certain individuals just didn't like your presence for some reason?

I have.  And this is my story of why those kinds of things happen to you...

The old saying: "We are not alone." is very true today.  But not for the reason you might think.  The 'aliens' figured into that statement aren't "out there" waiting to come here but rather 'here', slowly taking over.

Mankind, for ages beyond ages, has never been able to do things right.  Ever since Adam and Eve, they've been screwing up and creating more chaos than they know what to do with.  Just look at the recent events in your life.  Smog.  Pollution.  Racism.  Murder.  Hatred.  Selfishness.  Pride.  Waste.  Destruction.  And the list goes on.  For every good thing man ever does, there are a dozen ways he undoes it.

The best guess is that they've been around since the dark ages.  The problem was, they had just come into being then and knew nothing of control.    It was a bad time for them, to say the least, and worse for the humans of that period.

But, after a few hundred generations, they learned control and gradually we more or less forgot about them and dismissed them as fantasy and fiction.  Movies and books are about the only place you ever see or read about them today.  Unfortunately, those two avenues portray only their dark past...  

I lived a fairly average life until around the time modern werewolf movies, like The Howling, were coming out.  And that's when the spark of interest and curiosity was ignited in me.  A few years later, I came across a book about wolves and that's where it all really began.  After that, something in me delved into wolves and werewolves to a degree I couldn't have ever imagined.  A fascination that seated itself so firmly in my thoughtlife, it was impossible to escape.

But several years later, something changed.  I was suddenly more aware of people around me.  More sensitive to emotions and attitudes.  Some of it was fun.  Some of it wasn't.  And some of it just seemed so absolutely odd, I just couldn't shake the weirdness of it.

A few years ago, I remembered a place I visited with a girl I was with years before.  Long after we'd broken up, that place still beckoned to me in some weird way I just couldn't figure out.  It's a quaint little shopping mall known as "Underground Atlanta", located in Georgia, of all places.  Needless to say, I finally decided to see why it called to me so strongly.

When I arrived, it was just as I remembered... or thought I remembered.  Plenty of people milling around and going in and out, just like any other mall.  Except this one actually went underground.  There were two police officers posted at either side of the entrance to the mall.  As I glanced at them, they each smiled and nodded to me.  I smiled back.  But when I actually entered the mall, that's where things took a turn I wasn't expecting.

As I walked along, looking at all the different shops and places of possible interest, the people around me seemed different somehow.  And the weirdest thing kept happening.  As the crowds of people would walk past me, I'd get the sensation of something brushing against me around my legs every now and then.  At first I thought it was just my pants acting up, but after shaking them a few times, I realized it wasn't them.  But what was it?

The first time I started thinking something was up, was as I turned my head to glance at a group of people that passed me, just after I felt the same leg-brush feeling.  They were looking back at me with smiles that seriously spooked me!  I quickly looked away and tried to find a spot to let my heartrate slow down a bit.  Something definitely weird was going on.  As I looked around, I noticed quite a few would look my way.  Some smiled.  Others didn't.  But the look in their eyes was something that said they knew something I didn't... or maybe sensed I was onto something they wanted me to know.  I quickly set my mind to thinking about a few shops I wanted to visit.

First on the list... something in a wolf.

After walking around a bit longer, I soon located a nice little shop that dealt in facinating sculptures and pieces of art that drew my attention.

"Have anything in a wolf?", I asked.

The store employee glanced at another fellow, who quickly came over.

"You're closer than you think...", he replied, motioning towards several display racks full of wolf plates, sculptures, and pieces of art.  Not to mention a few large paintings as well.  As he turned to head back, there was that sensation again!  I knew what would happen next and, sure enough, he glanced back at me with that oddly knowing smile that haunted me so.

I browsed the selections and then decided on a wonderful M. Pena Wolf Council candle lamp.  Something about it called to that part of me that I knew so little about but felt so close to.  The fellow who pointed out the wolf items section was waiting at the cash register.

"You're the owner, aren't you?" I asked.

"Quite perceptive of you.  Are you always that observant?" he replied.

"Recently, yes." I answered.

He flashed me that odd, knowing smile and then rang up my purchase.  I paid cash.

He handed a card to me.

"This retailer can offer you more of what you seek."

I took the card and walked out.  I decided to venture to the shop he spoke of.  It was a little bit further down and offset from the main series of store fronts.  Amazingly enough, it had a most gorgeous wolf sculpture in the front window.  I walked in and, just as I did, several customers looked at me with that same eerie smile.  Thankfully, I was distracted by a young lady, I assumed to be a store employee, who quickly approached me.

"Can I help you?" she asked.

"Just looking around mostly." I replied.

"Something in a wolf?" she answered back

This seriously spooked me.  How'd she know?

"H... how'd you know that?" I stammered.

"You're closer than you think." she said.

"You know, that's what the other store owner said."

"It's true."

"What's true?  And what am I closer to than I think?  This whole mall is beginning to seriously freak me out!" I stated, a bit impatiently.

"So you've sensed it then." she said with another smile.

I was beginning to think there was a very big conspiracy going on and it was all aimed directly at me.

"Sensed what?" I asked.

"You tell me." she said, crossing her arms.

"You know, I really don't have time for this... I just came in to look for something in a wolf and..."

"You've found it." she grinned.

"Huh?"

She looked at the other customers and they each nodded.  My conspiracy theory was growing stronger by the second.

"Follow me..." she said as she walked towards the back room.

She directed me to a chair as she sat behind her desk.  It was a somewhat dark room.  I was growing just as curious as I was scared.

"Sorry to seem so cloak and daggerish, but not many share your gift of perception and desire to seek us out prior to the understanding."

" What ARE you talking about?" I asked emphatically.

"The understanding, as we call it, is the point at which a human is well aware of and accepts that they're not entirely... well, human.  It's the embracement of this understanding that enables such perception and a desire to seek us out."

"Ok... enough of the crazy-talk.  What do you want?"

"You've felt it, haven't you?  You've noticed it, right?"

"Huh?  Felt... noticed what?"

"Something brushing up against your leg.  The looks and glances by strangers as though they know you know something but aren't aware that you do just yet."

The hairs on my arm stood straight up.

"Uh... yeah.  So then there IS a conspiracy... or something... going on, right?"

"Not a conspiracy, mind you.  Just lack of absolute perception on your part.  You see, you're just coming into your understanding and don't realize it yet.  It's more scary than exciting right now, because all you've ever known were the human ways since your birth.  But that's changing..."

"What is it about the people in this mall?  What is it about me?"

"We are not as we appear... at least when humans are among us.  What you have been feeling are a few tails brushing against your leg.  Seems there is a "ghost sense" of that particular part of our anatomy that, thankfully is only felt by those who are coming into their understanding."

"And what about all the staring and smiles?"

"We can sense you're coming into your understanding.  Its a natural response for us to look at newcomers this way.  It seems eeire from a human standpoint, but it's more a gesture of acknowledgement and greeting than it appears to you."

"Can you prove all this?"

"Quite easily.  Stand up and reach down behind you around your legs."

I did so, but felt nothing.

"I don't feel anything."

"Don't try to feel based on actual substance.  Reach past that."

As I tried to do what she said, something tickled my hand just slightly.

"Wha...huh?" I exclaimed, jerking my hand back.

"You see... you've found it!"

"You mean... I have... a tail?"

"In a manner of speaking, yes.  But you haven't accepted your understanding entirely.  When you have, you will be able to feel your tail with ease and transform to your native form at will."

"How can I accept something I don't yet fully understand?"

"By asking..."

"Huh?"

"Since we're in the privacy of my office, no humans will see us.  But, before I show you, let me test your latent perceptions once again.  What do you think I will look like if I were to transform right now?"

"Well, assuming you're wolf..."

"That much I figured was obvious to you." she said with a grin.

I tried to imagine what she would look like based on my previous perceptions of people and their attitudes, mannerisms, etc.  Then I remembered something I had brought along with me... a drawing of my so-called "alter persona".

"Would you happen to look anything like this?" I said, presenting it to her.

She laughed.

"So aware, yet so unaware.  If I were you, yes... I would look like this.  But I am not quite so well built.  Of a truth, you at least know EXACTLY what you look like."

I was shocked... it was true.  They did exist!

"Well... to tell the truth, I didn't draw this..."

"Doesn't matter.  Whoever drew it, knew it was safe to do so.  Was it done in person or online?"

"Online.  I even have her Email address and..."

"We make it a point not to pry into individual wolves' lives outside of our pack.  Has she ever done similar works?"

"Nothing like this.  Mostly stuff about fennecs and other animals."

"Good.  We don't need exposure to the unaware human populace.  Have you shown this drawing to anyone else?"

"Just my brother, mother and a few friends... nothing has ever come of it.  No one I've shown this to believes such creatures even exist."

"Good.  We try to keep as low a profile as possible.  Chaos and destruction would reign utterly, if the truth were ever known."
 
"I can imagine.  So... um... going to show me what you look like when you're not posing as a human?"

She grinned.

"I thought you'd never ask..."

And almost in the blink of an eye or the span of a heartbeat, she was no longer human.  What she was, however, was something I found extremely beautiful to look at.

"Wow..." was the best I could mutter, as my jaw dropped.

"Please, don't start drooling... I just had the carpet cleaned and my mate would be sorely displeased to have a human so enamoured with me."

I quickly recovered myself.

"So I'm still human?"

"Of course... can you change as I just have?"

"Not that I know of, but...  my tail and..."

"What you experienced is but the beginning of your understanding.  And I have taken you a great deal further.  But you have a ways to go, still.  You don't become one of us without understanding what you are becoming and why."

"So then it's all real... this is me?" I said, pointing to the drawing.

"It is what you will become if you embrace it completely."

"I'm thinking I have already." I said with growing excitement.

"Let us test that..." she said as she reverted back to human form once again.

She directed me out of her office and as we headed out, I was momentarily shocked by the presence of several wolves where the customers were before.

"You see?  It is that very response that prevents you from attaining your final understanding.  When we, as wolves, are as natural to look at as the humans you see day-to-day, you will have attained full understanding of what it is to be one of us."

"Does that not come from exposure?"

"Exposure, alone, is not the answer.  Seeing us day-to-day, as wolves, would only acclimate you to our appearance, but not help you feel like one of us.  You must see yourself as one of us, in your heart and mind, before you can become one of us in the flesh.  Soul kinship precedes flesh kinship."

"How do I do that?"

She pointed to the drawing.

"I think you've already begun.  This drawing represents what you are, in potential.  Exercise your senses.  Explore your dreams.  Realize that what that picture shows you... is actually IN you."

Suddenly, my ears acted up for just a moment.  I shook my head and it was gone.  A little different from other times but still unsettling.

As I turned to leave, I suddenly noticed the entire mall was a swarm of wolves going every which way.  One of the wolves in the store tapped me on the shoulder.

"We only change to human form when humans are present.  The guards outside are our advance warning and activate the dog whistle alarm.  We can all hear it, but humans can't.  I doubt you did."

"So that's what it was... just a moment ago?"

He stared at me.

"You heard that?"

"My ears acted up for just a moment.  You didn't see me shake my head?"

"I thought you were just having a tic of some sort."

"Thanks..." I replied dryly.

He chuckled.

"You may be further along than we guessed.  Well, anyhow... enjoy shopping at the Underground.  And remember... say nothing of this place to anyone.  Oh, and remember to change before leaving."

It took a moment to realize what his last comment referred to.  I smiled.  I walked around the mall, utterly amazed by the variety of wolves and their wares.  This was an entirely secret society consisting of a species totally unknown by the outside world.  I wondered how many outside those mall doors were... wolves in man's clothing.

I went back to my motel room and pondered what I had just experienced.  I was going to be staying longer than I thought.  I decided renting... maybe even buying... a house was in order.  I wasn't going to leave now.  I had a new life ahead of me and I wanted to learn as much about it as possible.


... TO BE CONTINUED ...