Alien Abduction

Harry, Bill and Steve are sitting at the corner bar, when Ted walks in looking distressed.

"Ted, you look awful. What's wrong?" Harry asks.

Ted says, "Last night I got really drunk and I was abducted by an alien."

Everyone is shocked. Bill asks, "What did the alien do to you?"

"All I remember is being anally probed," Ted says.

Everyone is horrified. "I heard that they'll do that!" Steve says. "What did the alien look like?"

Ted responds, "Carl."