Freaking Meatbags is a 2D pixel sci-fi RTS where humans have been enslaved by a robotic rebellion. You’re a lowly Cleanerbot tasked with the undesirable job of strip mining a solar system of minerals before they are sucked into the sun. Unfortunately all you have to work with are these lazy meatbags. Maybe a little gene splicing can get them to work better…More after the jump.
Mining is tough, dirty, and often unappreciated work. Good thing you have grubby humans to do your bidding for you but they sure can be lazy. That’s okay, nothing a brain slug can’t fix. The core of the solar system is collapsing on itself you’ve been given the task of strip mining planets before it’s too late. Along the way you must take the lazy meatbags to task of extracting metals from the planets before they crash into the sun. Freaking Meatbags takes place in a sci-fi future where humanity has been overtaken by a robotic rebellion and you are their robotic taskmaster. Your boss has given you the job of extracting minerals and keeping the lazy humans safe because his wife thinks they’re cute. Luckily you can turn these feckless charges into something more meaningful with appropriately in-appropriate levels of SCIENCE. Laser eyes, rocket launchers, and self-destructing are some of the options you can equip your worthless human charges to help fend against the wild robots drawn to your mining operation each night.
The game begins with as the role a lowly Cleanerbot sent to collect resources before the Komikos system is to be squashed by smashing into the sun. A simple tutorial walks you through use of the Planet Map where you plot your next move mining planets, accessing the shop, upgrading your base/robot, and upgrading your base options as well as improving your fleshy slaves. You use the WASD keys to move around the Planet Map as well as the game map. When you land on your first planet you encounter your first humans which are admittedly really stupid. Their stupidity allows you command them relatively easily but basically limits them to the simple task of carry minerals back and forth. Each planet has a both a day and night cycle that ticks over in seconds, they can vary but generally they last as long as one another. During the day you set up defenses, manage your squishy workers, and ensure that you’re sticking to the objective for each planet. Your Cleanerbot acts as your camera as well as your builder so multi-tasking between defenses and managing your lazy humans is key. Your mission can vary from surviving wild robot waves, stockpiling resources, clearing the planet of robots, and a variety of tasks. When you complete your mission, you have the option of taking some humans with you to you next mission which creates a bit of tension as you inevitably create more humans than you could possibly carry. Occasionally you engage in a mission where your base is unable to land and you must traverse the level in a simple but engaging dungeon crawler where you destroy wild robots, collect minerals, equip drones to attack, and clear the stage. There are also missions where you must utilize new and interesting aliens that can you enhance your humans with as well as provide an interesting challenge. These are fun diversions that complete quickly.
The meat of the game comes from the splicing options available and optimizing your humans into tools greater than themselves. Your most basic human manipulation device is the DNA Fusion which couples two existing humans and allows you spend minerals to create more. This where you infuse humans with alien DNA, missions allow you access to different alien species which you can then cultivate new variant humans. You don’t lose the first two specimens so you can always pop them out to get them back to mining. With humans surviving as a perquisite for success defense naturally follows as an important part of the game. You have access to a variety of different options such as different types of walls as well as a few different variants of the basic gun turret such as lasers, missiles, and upgraded versions of each. Humans can manipulated to further defend themselves but typically this is a last resort as they often go splat against the wild robots’ steel hides. Lastly, there are resource structures you can construct that help with the efficacy of your mining operation such as roads that improve the speed of your lazy miners, or barracks which allow you house more of them. You can also build mining rigs to give you a trickle of resources constantly. Layered on top of this basic RTS system is a pseudo RPG system where the CPUs taken from destroyed Wild Robots can be used to improve passive features such as Cleanerbot’s health, speed, and other statistics such as your base’s health and build rate. This form of persistence adds a lot of depth to the game as you feel faster and tougher.
Visually the game is clean and crisp reminiscent of retro video games. Watching wild robots explode into a shower of bits is really satisfying. Every action from building structures to shooting feels chunky and visceral. Humans pop into showers of blood which can be really humorous until you’re greeted with a mission failure screen. The Planet Map is equally impressive with orbiting planets and the large sun that is populated with celestial debris and merchant ships. The dialogue within the game is very cheeky and often witty, I found myself endeared by the plot and characters that were introduced. The game has a ton of charm from the grinning slug merchant, your mom scolding you about not wearing your laser-proof sweater, and your HAL9000-esque boss threatening to can your butt if you don’t get this job done. Without revealing too much, not at all is that it seems to be in the Komikos sector. There are definitely a lot of little nods to pop culture such as brain slugs.
Given that this an Early Access title, there is a surprising few bugs to be found. If you had told me this was a completed game I’d be more than pleased so the inclusion of further updates is both exciting and something to look forward to. The amount of content is great given the price tag and with extras planned in the future this game has the potential to be a wonderful title. You can command these Freaking Meatbags now on Steam here.
