That being said, we can control our action. It can get really complicated, messy, and your feelings could get destroyed in the process. If you still want to move forward with dating a married man, this is everything you should know. This is a must-ask question. How is his relationship with his wife? Like I mentioned above, some men just want fun. Do you really want to waste your time with a married man who you never have a chance of actually being with? You can see some of the most important ones listed in another section so you can decide for yourself. We all know what happens when word gets out that a man was cheating on his wife. The other girl becomes the talk of the town — and not in a good way. This is important for a lot of reasons. If he told you right away that he was married and you pursued him, then he was giving you an opportunity to leave. Are you able to deal with being put on the backburner and not being a priority in his life? The main purpose of dating someone is to build a future with them. Divorce comes with a lot of drama for the husband. Are you ready to deal with all of that right beside him? Are you ready to help him through such a difficult time? Do you know them all that well in the first place or do you think you know them? Many married men take on a new persona when having an affair and you have to realize that. It can be really hard during certain times and you have to maintain a clear head so you can think logically about things. This is what you have to deal with. This is something you can never forget. The majority of men will NEVER leave their wives for their mistress. They will have fun with you and maybe actually care a lot about you, but in the end, his wife is the woman he gave his vows to and promised to be with forever. Get ready or the judgment if you want to date and love a married man. Your friends and family will probably not be supportive at all and that can be a difficult thing to get past. Tips for Dating a Married Man Now that you know all of that and you still want to move forward with dating a married man, there are a few things you can do to make it easier. Here are some tips to keep things from going south. This is the worst thing you can do and ultimately, you will lose him for doing this. If he asks you to only call during a certain time on a certain phone, then you must agree to that. This may seem like an odd tip, but think about it. Sure, the same principals apply, but there are a whole host of other rules you must follow if you want to make your relationship with him work. This is the number one rule you have to follow. If the relationship is going to be a complete waste of time, then you should look elsewhere. Your time is precious and you only have one life. You need to learn to live it and make the time you spend worth a damn. This can help make sure your relationship is going somewhere. Tell him that you want something real with him — not just a hookup. Many guys like to dangle false hope in front of their mistresses in an attempt to keep them around. Truthfully, there are many. This is a big one. If word gets out about your affair, your reputation can get squashed. The reality of dating a married man is that the relationship will likely be short. Not many men actually divorce their wives so they can be with their mistresses. Wasted time is a reality of loving and dating a married man. Can you life with that? You should wait for him to be divorced or not get involved at all. Have been dating tbis other married man. He says he love me and I love him too. He doesnt mention anything about his wife at least he talks about his children. We have sex once a week and sometimes we go outside the city for fun. When i want sex he is not there but when he wants some am there. I sometimes make a decision to leave him but he just pops up as if he knew what i wanted to do. I want to leave him but am failing. You want someone who can meet your needs. He is married, so allow thoughts of him to fade. Inform him that you are no longer interested in maintaining a relationship with him. If his relationship naturally ends, then speak with him about your thoughts and feelings at that time. For now, determine what you want for your future without him. Have a great day, Peace! He does everything for me. Pays the rent, fixes my car, gives me money, takes me out, etc. I recently asked him if he was planning to leave his wife at some point. He told me that he was not going to leave her because she deserved a second chance. He does not want me to date other men even though he has a wife at home. He is always checking up on me and has followed me on a number of occasions. Leaving him is hard. I have broken up with him 3 times only to go back into the relationship with him. He have a plan to get married with me. However being a young girl i have to think twice aboput married him. He is truely in love with me and to his wife as well, he never been talk bad about his wife to me. The two of you share a strong emotional connection. However, this relationship is or will cause emotional harm to an innocent person. Focus your emotional energy elsewhere. Strengthen your relationships with your family and friends. Speak with him about your thoughts and feelings. Have a great day, Kavy! It is current and yet, I am getting deeper inlove with him. He mentioned that he does not want me to be away. I am seeing him everyday since we are on same working place. Just the schedule is a little bit different. To make it also clear, we support each other, especially on financial, since me already have kids too. Sometimes, I feel wanted to give up, but I end up thinking all the effort I made for him. I really love him. I also feel the same way, ofcourse, reality bites as well. Please give me advice on what to do. He is married, and because of that, you should not attempt to develop a relationship with him. Continue to share your kindness and compassion with him and everyone else in your life. The two of you can continue to support each other. If your friendship causes trouble in his marriage, then reduce your interactions. Have a great day, Chi! Im ashamed to say i even attended his wedding. All that love was still there,he reached out after a while but i didnt like the idea of being a mistress. I want to end it but I also dont want to lose him. I may be blinded by a LOT but i love him. He concealed that hes married, if I have known I wouldnt continue our relationship but Its too late when I found out that hes married as I fall for him already. Fast forward, we continue our relationship. We met and had fun. Later on he said he wanted to end because he feel guilty. So on my part I was desperate not to end, I messaged him everyday. At some point I gave up. I think after a month he messaged me and for me nothings changed I forgave him but I know he changed but on my part its okay as long as hes still with me. I know am desperate but thats how i feel i really love him. I know this is wrong. I just need some hammer to put on my head to wake me up with this insanity. There is no reason to attempt to maintain a relationship with him. Do not continue to attempt to harm his relationship. There is no benefit to be gained in doing so. Allow thoughts of him to fade. Focus your emotional energy elsewhere. Take this time to determine what you want with your future without him. Have a great day, Lily! But its like an addiction that I cant help my self as of this time. I want to forget him but its so hard on my part. Im sick and tired of being treated like a trash. I really want to stop this shitty relationship but I cant. What should I do? Thank you for your advice. Take this time to yourself. Do not reach out to this person for two weeks. If you think about him, then allow that to remind you to live in the moment. Take a deep breath and focus on what you are doing at that moment. If you are doing nothing, then focus on your breath. This will ensure that your thoughts and emotional connection with him fade. Have a great day, Lily! So after him needing me from time to time. We go out together in public and be all lovey dovey. He will never leave his wife that I know. I mentioned to him that I need to move out and get a place. He briefly discussed how we would work around that. His concerns are that should we break up or should he die what will happen. He can purchase the house but how should I work around the constraints that his married. These actions will only cause harm to yourself, him, his partner, and his family. Stop communicating with him at this time. Look inward and determine what you want for your future. Think about his partner and how your actions are influencing her emotional. I know that this whole thing is not healthy for me, as I tried breaking up with him multiple times throughout the course of our 5 month, and continuing affair. What do I do? You have ended your relationship and you have continued to return. You are giving him confusing signs, and his focus on you is not good for his family. Remove yourself from his life. Do not meet with him or communicate with him. If he communicates with you, then explain that he needs to focus on his wife. New opportunities will become available. If you want a life that is destructive to relationships and trust, then perhaps you should speak with this man about his relationship with his wife. Perhaps speak with his wife about your feelings. If you want to live a life of kindness and compassion, then allow these feelings to fade. A new opportunity, one without harm, will become available in the future.
