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ARMY GAGS!
March 2004 Issue!
1st Ossie
2.50
Meet the team!
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Hi! And welcome to the very first issue of Army Gags! Let's Meet the team!
Name: John Cork
Age: 19
Bio: When he was 7, he was an orphan. The army came to celebrate the orphanages 10th birthday and picked him to join.
Name: JAck
Age: 18
Bio: Unknown
And finally....
Name: General Oustain
Age: Dunno
Bio: Unknown
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In this issue!
P4. The Army
P8. Jokes
P9. Scrap Mail
P10. Johns Life
P12. Lunch!
P15. Comic Book Experience
P20. More Jokes!
P21. Goodbye!
El Jonno: "I didn't do it!" "Eheh!" "Shut up!" "The freak who took this comic, say your prayers!"
Jack: "What about me!?"
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THE ARMY
And it 'aint pretty!
John and Jack were asleep
*zzz*
*zzzz*
When...
*BRRIINNGG*
John and jack woke up with a start.
John: "AAAAHHHH!"
Jack: "AAAHH!"
John: "Oh no! It's training!"
Jack: "It is?"
John: "We gotta get ready!"
(Page 5)
John: "If we're late, don't blame me!"
Jack: "Ok! Ok!" *Grumpy*
Just then, the general came in!
Oustain: "Boys! You're late!"
Jack: "Sorry!"
Later...
John: "I hate training!"
Jack: "So do I!"
Oustain: "Keep moving!"
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Oustain: "Keep ya' hair on!"
Suddenly...
Jack: "Woah!"
John: "Huh? Jack??"
Jack: "Look out below!"
Bonk!
Oustain: "Stand up!"
Jack: "I hurt myself!"
(Page 7)
After training...
John: "I'm bored!"
Jack: "Me too!"
John: "All we've done for the past 3 hours is watch T.V.!"
Almost mid-night.
T.V.: "Sick and tired of being in the army? Call 0800 287 287 33
John: "Hey look!"
Jack: " What stupid?"
John: "He calls me stupid!"
THE END
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JOKES
Equipment: Whoppie cusion
Joke: Blow up the cusion. (Not to much) And put it under a pillow. It's a boobie trap so your not there when the joke happens.
What's the difference between a baker and a heavy sleeper? One bakes the bread and the otehr breaks the bed.
What's the difference between a clockmaker and a jail keeper? One seels watches and the other watches cells.
(Page 9)
SCRAP MAIL
What's it about?
What exactly is army gags about?
It's about 2 people in the army.
The alien creeba treeba fleeba kleeba?
What!?
One question
How many issues of army gags will there be?
I don't know I didn't make it!
70s John
John Presly
Baby John
Giant John
(Page 10)
JOHNS LIFE
John may have a boring life...
But he's one cool guy
John: "Hey wanna know what I do for a living?"
Army!*
*obviously!
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He's in the army because his friend jack is.
He has a really dumb boss, the general. called gen. for short.
Not nice!
John and jack work very hard and I mean very hard.
Jack: "Hey, what about me!"
Its your life next issue!
(Page 12)
LUNCH!
John: "It's lunch!"
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Jack: "But i'm not dressed!"
John: "You're not the only one!"
5 minutes later...
John: "Hooray! We're dressed!"
Jack: "What about lunch?"
John: "Good point!"
So John and Jack tore away to the lunch hall.
(Page 14)
Jack: "Mmph!! What do you wanna do after lunch?"
John: "Dunno"
RRIINNGG!
"Aahh fire!"
General
Oustain: "Blah!"
John & Jack: "What fire!?"
John: "Ha! Ha!"
The end
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Comic book experience
And he flew to the baddies base.
He had a cool fight.
Jack: "Hey!"
Jack: "I was reading that!"
Oustain: "You missed training to read that!"
Jack: "Well duh!"
