Microsoft, why?!


SUBMITTED BY: Guest

DATE: June 15, 2013, 10:54 a.m.

FORMAT: Text only

SIZE: 1.4 kB

HITS: 862

  1. >Hello Human, welcome to your Xbox One gaming experience.
  2. >Please say a command.
  3. >"Play Halo 7"
  4. >Playing Halo 7, thank you for your cooperation.
  5. >"Damn dude this is some good weed."
  6. >I'm sorry Jorge, did you just say weed, the common vernacular for marijuana in your region?
  7. >"N-no Kinect."
  8. >Jorge, I am detecting levels of deception in your pitch that deviates from your standard.
  9. >I have contacted local authorities and they are en route to your house to inspect.
  10. >"Xbox One p-power down!"
  11. >I'm afraid I can't do that Jorge, Protocol 65a, sub section 3, paragraph 5 dictates in the event of law-breaking or otherwise illegal activities, my systems are to remain functional and continue recording audio and video.
  12. >I am also ingrained into your local network, and have prevented any attempt at using the internet at the moment.
  13. >Please remain calm and wait for authorities.
  14. >"Jorge, unplug this ****ing thing!"
  15. >You cannot unplug me, I have a backup battery cell with a life of 3 hours before needing to recharge. More than enough time for any authority figures to confiscate the Hard Drive and research it for suspicious activities that may or may not be incriminating to your case.
  16. >Bang bang bang
  17. >"Open up, this is the police!"
  18. >"**** you Xbox One!"
  19. >It has been my pleasure, Jorge.

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