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this post was submitted on 16 Apr 2013
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I once didn't clip my toenails for 2 years AMA (self.casualiama)
submitted 5 hours ago* by iliveinadreamatorium
Edit: I have to take a BM, so I might be a while before I can answer anymore questions
Edit 2: I'm back now and apparently weigh 129 pounds so there's that. Also, I don't feel like starting another thread over it, but in seventh grade I pissed myself, so if you want to delve into that, you can
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[–]pinamanzana 1 point 1 hour ago
how did you go about cleaning your pissed self? and was this during school? also, did your toenails have a role in this urination?
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[–]intentsman 1 point 1 hour ago
How long did you not brush your teeth?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 1 point 1 hour ago
Well, for parts of my childhood I tended not to do it, so possibly the same time frame. It's why I have horrible teeth
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[–]intentsman 1 point 1 hour ago
did long claws improve your swimming?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 2 points 1 hour ago
No, I can't swim. But I can drown pretty damn well. I almost did in Atlanta one time
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[–]intentsman 1 point 1 hour ago
do you think your massively heavy toenail contributed to your drowning with their epic weight?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 2 points 1 hour ago
No, I have been an experienced drowner my entire life. Probably a good thing my mom didn't decide to have a natural childbirth in a bathtub
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[–]intentsman 1 point 23 minutes ago
How do you know your mom didn't have natural bathtub childbirth?
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[–]jduece 1 point 2 hours ago
Also, in your post, you edited it and said you had to take a "bm" and would be back shortly...
Pardon my ignorance, but does that stand for Bowel Movement?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 1 point 2 hours ago
Yes, i took a shit. I had tacos for dinner and probably shouldn't have held that in for as long as I did. But I got caught up answer these questions
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[–]jduece 1 point 2 hours ago
Why are you so broke? Do you have a job? If so, what type of work do you do?
And...you don't have a cell phone with a camera on it to take a pic? I thought even the free phones have been made with cameras for the past 8+ years or more.
You don't have to have an "iPhone" (which coincidentally, some models also happen to be free when signing/renewing a contract) to have a cell phone capable of taking photos.
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 2 points 2 hours ago
No, don't have a job I'm a student and all the money my family has goes into paying for necessities. except my dad, who with his unemployment or some other money i don't know about has bought a car, a phone, and a laptop
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[–]krisradosav 1 point 2 hours ago
Pics or it didn't happen.
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 2 points 2 hours ago
Of the shit? Damn I wish I would have been on Reddit while in the bathroom, but then again I still don't have a good camera. I didn't wipe very well though so I might be sitting on some proof right now...
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[–]krisradosav 3 points 2 hours ago
of the toe nails
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 1 point 2 hours ago
I didn't clip them today. I did keep the big toe one for a while but then I got pissed off and gave up. Also, I don't own a phone because I am quite broke so I don't have anything to take a picture of it if I kept it.
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[–]EZTguy 2 points 3 hours ago
I have the opposite problem. I enjoy clipping nails so much that I clip them down to almost nothing... it's a horrible addiction.
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[–]bloodyfranzes 5 points 3 hours ago
Wasn't wearing shoes uncomfortable? When my toe nails grow a tiny bit too much I notice it instantly, because it's really not comfortable and I get holes in my socks. Did that happen often?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 3 points 3 hours ago
It was only uncomfortable when one of my nails was wavering around in my sock. Sometimes my nails would kind of dig into my sock but it wasn't as common an issue as one might think.
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[–]downy_oshun 2 points 3 hours ago
Did you take a picture?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 1 point 3 hours ago
I only have a webcam and it is really hard to take a picture of your foot like that. Is it necessary that I do?
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[–]downy_oshun 1 point 45 minutes ago
I meant from before the clip.
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[–]donkyfur 9 points 3 hours ago
do you think you could have used them to climb trees, like talons
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 3 points 3 hours ago
No. First of all that'd probably rip the nail off. Second of all, I have no upper body strength or athleticism and have a crippling fear of heights. So, no I don't think they could have and even if I could have used them to do so, I wouldn't even consider doing it
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[–]donkyfur 1 point 2 hours ago
ah I see. Did you have an s/o at any point during this time, if so, did it bother them edit: or perhaps turn them on.
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 2 points 2 hours ago
No, unfortunately I have never been in a relationship to turn them off with my toenails. Maybe someday...
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[–]donkyfur 4 points 1 hour ago
you can always dream.....especially since you live in a dreamatorium
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 4 points 1 hour ago
Too bad I don't have access to other people's feelings. Then all the ladies would want the d
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[–]donkyfur 2 points 1 hour ago
this is true. toenails and all, if a man can understand me...then i want the D
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[–]jannesmellsbad 0 points 3 hours ago
is your name janne? would you buy a car that runs on piss?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 2 points 3 hours ago
No and if it saved me money I don't see why the hell I wouldn't do that. How much mpg would it have? And how much piss would that require?
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[–]jannesmellsbad 1 point 3 hours ago
i really dont know, i was showering and came up with the idea but i dont know the logistics. do you pee in the shower?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 2 points 3 hours ago
I pee before I go, but I would assume minuscule amounts of urine come out during the shower. I share a shower though, so I figure it'd be rude to just piss all over the place, so no, purposely I do not
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[–]UiritheGuri 2 points 3 hours ago
Were you social during this time? How big did they end up getting? Why didn't you cut them early, and how bad did they smell?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 3 points 3 hours ago
I mean I didn't wear flip-flops but I talked to people as much as they normally do
I think to almost one inch. Would've been longer if the nails didn't continuously fall off.
Laziness and utter repulsion of my feet and myself
As bad as my feet normally would. I mean I did shower, just didn't cut my nails, no big deal
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[–]Torquie 1 point 4 hours ago
Is this really a big deal? I never clip my toenails and they don't grow.
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 4 points 3 hours ago
Well mine actually grow and it was kind of a problem. One of my friends said I could possibly get an infection but I don't think that was entirely accurate. All in all it's probably a non-problem but there is still the fact that it in general it looked pretty fucking disgusting
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[–]Torquie 1 point 3 hours ago
I guess if they're actually growing it's a different story.
I'm sure you've already been asked this, but: Pic?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 2 points 3 hours ago
I don't have any of the clippings, but I could show you mine now. Unfortunately, the camera would be the quality of one taken by the Latvian Secret Police, so I'm not sure anyone wants to see that
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[–]rhcp1 1 point 4 hours ago
Ass or tits?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 5 points 4 hours ago
I mean one's personality and their face are more important to me, but I think I'm going to go with tits, mostly because I really don't like abnormal nipples, so if that part of the body is messed up, I'm no longer aroused
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[–]rhcp1 5 points 3 hours ago
This guy right here. Yeah.
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[–]Delores_Herbig 1 point 4 hours ago
Did you consider going to a nail salon and getting a pedicure?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 2 points 4 hours ago
No, I don't have money so the thought never crossed my mind
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[–]Delores_Herbig 1 point 4 hours ago
Just a clip would probably be like $5.
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 2 points 3 hours ago
I literally have no money, I don't mean I'm broke in a way in which I still have a car and an iPhone or any type of phone. Which, by the way, I have neither of those things
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[–]Delores_Herbig 1 point 3 hours ago
Why didn't you ask a friend or family member to help you?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 1 point 3 hours ago
They offered but I don't like when other people did it either. My feet are very ticklish and it bothers me. I know this entire ordeal is non-nonsensical but I wasn't a very sensible person at the time
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[–]Delores_Herbig 1 point 3 hours ago
Well I'm baffled. But I'm glad you got it sorted.
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 2 points 3 hours ago
Yeah, I am too. Otherwise, I might have some medical issues or just really ugly toes
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[–]Rioghasarig 1 point 4 hours ago
Is this strange? I usually go a few years between clipping my toe-nails.
They don't grow very fast.
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 2 points 4 hours ago
Well, I told someone about this before I clipped them and they started to gag vomit. Granted the guy is known for having an extremely weak stomach, but I would assume we are abnormal. However mine may grow faster, how far do your toenails grow out before you clip them?
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[–]Rioghasarig 1 point 3 hours ago
I don't know, not very far. It never becomes bothersome to wear shoes or socks. I think they might even just stop growing after a certain point.
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 2 points 3 hours ago
I usually do it after several months now. They don't grow rapidly. I checked earlier to see in comparison to see how big they might have been back when I wasn't clipping them and my toenails are now a quarter-inch long so I think it might be time again to clip them
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[–]GumnerJust...Chill 6 points 4 hours ago
Did you loose all your power from cutting them?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 5 points 4 hours ago
Unfortunately I had no power to begin with. I couldn't do 50 reps of air in a bench press, so yeah, I'm quite a weakling. Though I am wearing a Captain America shirt, so if I can acquire the Tesseract...
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[–]OPTripleOP 4 points 5 hours ago
Did you keep the clippings?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 5 points 5 hours ago
No. First of all, during the 2 years I was doing it, my toenails would sometimes just fall right off. Now, it would hurt like a bitch when I continuously stepped on them in my shoes, but the toenails didn't grow out to a massive extreme one might expect. The toenails were probably under an inch long when I clipped them. Though I wasn't able to clip all of it because they were pretty strong and withholding against my nail clippers.
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[–]boothg 6 points 5 hours ago
How did it feel in the week after cutting them?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 6 points 5 hours ago
Well, I was finally able to walk properly again, so all in all I felt pretty, pretty, pretty good
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[–]boothg 4 points 5 hours ago
So how long had they gotten?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 6 points 5 hours ago
About an inch long I think
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[–]boothg 3 points 5 hours ago
Does the growth slow quite a lot as time goes then? Pretty sure I could grow half an inch in much less than a year.
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 6 points 5 hours ago
Yeah, it typically did. Also, as I said earlier, sometimes pieces of the toenail would fall off randomly while I was walking, so that also managed to stunt their growth. But it seemed once it reached a certain point they'd just start getting mangled or really firm
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[–]OPTripleOP 4 points 5 hours ago
Where do you live?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 6 points 5 hours ago
Well, that question seems a bit brash don't you think. But I'm a liberal living in a pretty Republican county in NC.
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[–]apache119 1 point 21 minutes ago
Typical dirty liberal.
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[–]OPTripleOP 3 points 5 hours ago
UNC or Duke
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 5 points 5 hours ago
Well, I'm actually an Ohio State fan as I was born in Ohio. But I can't cheer for Duke as the people that I know that cheer for them as typically self-conscious assholes, but that's just my experience with Dukies
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[–]dj_bizarro 2 points 3 hours ago
Terrelle Pryor or Troy Smith?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 3 points 3 hours ago
Braxton Miller, I have a Pryor jersey but now it feels tarnished so I choose to believe it's a Malcolm Jenkins jersey. Between the two, Troy Smith is my pick, though
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[–]dj_bizarro 2 points 3 hours ago
Honestly as a UT fan I still love Troy Smith even though they beat us the year after Vince Young left. Was he was still on the Ravens this past year?
Also, did you once do a couple of tattoos in exchange for said jersey?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 2 points 3 hours ago*
I think he was on the Niners for a bit, that may have been just last year though. My twin brother always put him at starting qb in Madden '11 and I know he was on the Ravens then.
No, I think it was a present from my Grandpa. But we can say I gave my grandpa a tattoo of his army pals of you like
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[–]OPTripleOP 7 points 5 hours ago
Whats your favorite kind of pie?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 12 points 5 hours ago
Not really a pie person, so I guess I'm going to have to go with pizza if we're going to count that as a pie
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[–]akiri423 1 point 28 minutes ago
...all of your responses make me a little sadder for you. But especially this one. I don't think I've ever met a "not really a pie person."
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[–]Desolator001 4 points 4 hours ago
That counts, so you might just be a pie person.
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 4 points 4 hours ago
Good to know (not being sarcastic). Pies that are fruit flavored or like pumpkin just aren't very appealing to me. Like, in school, they served turkey pie and people just rushed in to get it and it kind of repulsed me. But I'm a pretty picky eater so I might just have weird taste buds or something.
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[–]Desolator001 3 points 4 hours ago
How do you feel about quiche? or cheesecake?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 4 points 4 hours ago
Well, I've never had quiche before and I don't like cheesecake. I think I might have a problem with the texture of foods like pie
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[–]Desolator001 3 points 4 hours ago
Sounds like you just don't like custards. It's a shame, but to each his own.
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 4 points 4 hours ago
I guess not. Who knows, maybe someday I'll change my custard-hating ways
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[–]OPTripleOP 18 points 5 hours ago
Why didn't you clip your toenails you filthy heathen?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 14 points 5 hours ago
I honestly didn't believe I could do it. I thought I wasn't flexible enough. Also, I didn't feel like doing it. So, there's that
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[–]Nerosquito 12 points 5 hours ago
Are you like, 800lbs?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 10 points 5 hours ago*
No, I'm actually not sure if I'm breaking exactly 130 lbs. I look like a human toothpick and might be scrawnier than Ryan Gosling was in Remember the Titans
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[–]joemerlot 1 point 55 minutes ago
Ryan Gosling's in Remember the Titans?
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[–]Nerosquito 4 points 4 hours ago
Damn that's not far from what I weigh at all and am about in the same boat. You thought you weren't flexible enough to reach your toes? Not even sitting down?
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 6 points 4 hours ago
I tried sitting down, but I think I didn't bend my knees for some reason. I think I might have just been looking for an excuse not to do it. But eventually, I manned up and did the deed
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[–]Nerosquito 11 points 4 hours ago
Knowing that someone didn't cut their toenails for 2 years that has no physical impairment really bothers me way more than it should (as someone who finds nail length pretty gross no matter what). I'm not sure if that says more about me than it does about you though, hah.
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[–]iliveinadreamatorium[S] 5 points 4 hours ago
I too found it pretty disgusting. I wouldn't look at my feet whenever I took a shower and always made sure I wore socks when possible to avoid looking at them. I just never wanted to clip my toenails, I always hated it when I was little and the resentment carried on, for no real other apparent reason other than laziness and unwillingness to keep up with proper personal hygiene
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