The Nine Satanic Statements
from The Satanic Bible, ©1969
by Anton Szandor LaVey
1. Satan represents indulgence instead of abstinence!
2. Satan represents vital existence instead of spiritual pipe dreams!
3. Satan represents undefiled wisdom instead of hypocritical self-deceit!
4. Satan represents kindness to those who deserve it instead of love
wasted on ingrates!
5. Satan represents vengeance instead of turning the other cheek!
6. Satan represents responsibility to the responsible instead of
concern for psychic vampires!
7. Satan represents man as just another animal, sometimes better, more
often worse than those that walk on all-fours, who, because of his
“divine spiritual and intellectual development,” has become the most
vicious animal of all!
8. Satan represents all of the so-called sins, as they all lead to
physical, mental, or emotional gratification!
9. Satan has been the best friend the Church has ever had, as He has
kept it in business all these years!
