If you're into chicks that look like dudes, just get with a dude. My acquaintance's sentiment is shared by many and, as a feminine lesbian whose fiancé falls more on the androgynous side of the feminine-masculine spectrum, I'm often asked point blank why I just don't date men. However, I've only been asked about my preference for androgynous women by heterosexuals and gay men, never by another lesbian. If you like boys so much, why don't you want to date my girlfriend who 'looks like a boy'? Case dismissed, overruled, approach the bench, goodnight. This may come as shocking news to some people, but it is a completely arbitrary, socially constructed standard that men should wear bow-ties and women should wear pearls, and not vice versa. Moreover, rules about how men and women should dress and behave are constantly changing, further evincing that these constructs are subjective. Today, women are working outside of the home and continuing to make progress towards securing jobs traditionally held by men. There are androgynous and masculine presenting women, such as model , who identify as straight. However, the reality is that none of the women I have dated have ever wanted to be a man, nor did I ever want them to be men. They were just being true to themselves and recognize that there is more than just one way of being a woman, similar to the trailblazers who dared to pave the way for us to become attorneys and wear slacks in the face of being told that these behaviors were reserved for boys. Never for one second while wearing men's clothing or any other type of clothing, do I feel like I want to be a man. There is nothing about becoming a heterosexual man that is in any way appealing to me. I wear 'men's clothing' because I like the aesthetic. I feel sexier in a button-down and a bow-tie than I ever have in a dress. I am drawn to men's clothing because it allows me to be in control of how my body and person are perceived. In men's clothing, no one has visual ownership of my curves, breasts, behind, or any other part of my body. Why do we have to gender items of clothing so hard anyway? Like calm down everyone, the world isn't going to spin out of the galaxy. What makes a men's shirt a men's shirt and not a women's shirt? What exactly is the difference? If it's the cut, shouldn't I shop for what cut fits my body best? So if I choose a shirt that's cut to fit my body best, and it happens to be from the J. Crew men's department, does that mean I'm trying to make the world believe I'm a man? It means I choose to wear clothing that fits my body the way I was born. What makes a tie or a bowtie 'men's'? Is it because historically they were only worn by men? Historically we also wore wool bathing suits! Historically doesn't matter anymore. Ties don't belong to men. Ties are an accessory--just like a scarf, watch or belt--that don't have a gender. Once you de-gender-ize clothing, all you see is a person. I just happen to be attracted to a woman who can fearlessly walk out of the house without a drop of makeup, who looks spectacular with short hair, and who has a seductive silhouette in a masculine blazer. In no way does this alone make me sexually interested in men or mean that I should be. I am still a lesbian. Although men can look sharp in suits, which are just made of fabric after all, as a lesbian, I find them to be sexier on women.
